Still not ready…

I thought I could do it. I thought I could open the parcel and look at the surprise I had made for (E).

I didn’t think it would be a big deal. But it is.

I’m sitting here, looking at it on my bed, still sealed in its brown packaging.

But I have tears welling in my eyes. I don’t want to rush things, but I cannot hide from them either.

I want to read it. To see what I feel when I read it. Although I think I already know the answer to that enquiry.

I’m going to put some cream on my hands, as they’ve become sore this past week, through stress no doubt, and then, when that’s worked, I’ll try again…

For the sake of the surprise, I shall not be sharing images of the item on here, until (E) has seen it. Obviously, that might be a long while. But I need to be able to not cry like a little baby when reading it I feel. Either that or accept it’s going to be hard to read…


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