Xmas gifting etiquette?

So. I opened the christmas present she gave me.
It was brutal. In the best way.
It was a bottle of my favourite liqueur. Which is a huge reason i shouldn’t have opened it.
It was super-romantic. Because it means she remembered my favourite.
The present was given to me before this hiccup, as was my gift to her (a bottle of one of her favourite wines)…

The card was simple, but here was a sealed envelope inside. A letter of some sort. A letter shes told me not to read. Because of this hiccup (it was written before).
I can only assume it was something ridiculously romantic. But i cannot open it until she says so.
If it is what i think – its better for me not to read it. Unless she says so.

Ive written her a poem. I beautiful poem. It was going to be part of her main Christmas present. Which i now have to put on the back burner. Regardless of how i feel.
Argh. This is so frustrating.
{Cue tears}

Now. The gift from her parents:
I have opened the gift(s) from her parents… one of which is a box of chocolates. Simple enough. Theyre chocolates i like, and im considerably grateful for them.
The second, however, is maybe bit much. It was a £10 gift voucher for waterstones.
Considering it was her parents that questioned the speed of the relationship and are a little concerned by our age gap (10 years – im 29 – which i totally get) id feel a little awkward keeping it.

I feel like i should return it and say it was too much. I cant acceot a gift that expensive from people who are now concerned about me.

I dont know what to do. If im honest. I feel like i should return it. I dont feel comfortable accepting it.

But i dont want to upset/anger her or her parents any more than i may have done already.

Has anyone ever had to deal with a similar situation? Im so stuck.

My emotional self is about to cry if i carry on thinking about this. So goodnight all!


8 thoughts on “Xmas gifting etiquette?

  1. Hi Dan. My feeling is that you should not give it back, as that gesture in general usually sends quite a negative message. Maybe if you have concerns about how much they spent on you, that concern can be better interpreted if you put it in the form of graciousness…maybe in the form of a thank you note, and just acknowledge their generosity. Either way, I know you’ll make the right decision, and I hope it works out for you. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Do you think? I’m a little unsure I feel right accepting it when comments from them may have started her down this path of doubt. Maybe hats my personal annoyance coming through?
      Maybe you’re right. A thank you note might go a longer way than giving it back. Thank you again. The last thing I want to do is make them think negatively of me 😢


      1. Do you feel comfortable enough communicating with her parents that you can just be open? Because I think your feelings are valid and reasonable. Rather than simply throwing a gift back in their face or just saying “thank you,” maybe communicate some of your concern to them…in a nice way…?

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I’m not really sure to be honest. The more I think about it. The more I feel a simple thank you not would be more appreciated. They’re genuinely lovely people so maybe gratitude will go a longer way with them than a simple ‘thanks but no thanks’.
        I think i was just initially confused because they’ve been so generous with their Xmas gifts and yet stirred up the doubt in her mind. Maybe that’s me over thinking it – I’m not sure anymore.

        Liked by 1 person

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