Post #3: Her voice, it echoes!

So previous to my last post, I’m pretty heart-broken. She said no, the age gap was too much (10 years is a big gap, so i get that). But I’d set my heart on trying to persuade her. But I don’t get to have that chance.

The problem is, that one of the things that attracted me to her initially, was her voice. To some that may sound weird but, to me, some one’s voice can be a deal breaker. I think, for me at least, a nice voice is up there with nice eyes if I’m honest!

So everywhere I go, I hear someone say a word and for that split-second, that miniscule moment in time, my brain is tricked into thinking it’s her. Almost like the sight of a bolt of lightning or the sound of thunder, it cuts through all the white noise of life!

Like the crisp sound of thunder, or the shock of lightning, her voice echoes...
Like the crisp sound of thunder, or the shock of lightning, her voice echoes…

If it isn’t her, then of course it’s nervousness for no reason and i have to push it back into place, after it pretty much pounds in my chest.

If it is her, I have to hide that nervousness and bring up the courage not to let any feelings show. I don’t want to lose the friendship, no matter how I feel about it. Not to mention I think I’d die inside even more if she began to blank me.

I was sat in the shower and spoke the following poem out loud. It brought a tear to my eye and it kind of sets out how I feel. So I leave you with this poem, and the realisation that, no matter what happens, something good can come out of it all…

This Time I’ll Go

Her voice, like a healer,

Wherever I go,

I turn on me heel,

And begin to glow,

But disappointed I am,

For her it is no,

So I hunt for that voice,

And feelings they show,

Yet as I stand here,

Her answer is: no.

A tear in my eye,

This is a wounding blow,

But the worst was to come,

As I now know,

That no matter the pain,

Her voice makes me glow.

An impossible journey,

Up a river I row,

Colder and colder,

I’ve hit the ice flow.

But no matter the words,

No matter the woe,

As if like an angel,

Her voice makes me glow.

She said it for sure,

And that word was No.

So with a tear in my eye,

This time I’ll go…

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